


bored

by ueberdemnebelmeer



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: (is it really humour tho? I'm pants at it), Air Kisses, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Blowing kisses, Canon Era, Community: kinksofcamelot, Don't copy to another site, Established Relationship, Fluff and Humor, Kink Meme, Knighting ceremony, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-20
Updated: 2019-06-20
Packaged: 2020-05-15 06:42:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19290322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ueberdemnebelmeer/pseuds/ueberdemnebelmeer
Summary: Questionable remedies to knighting ceremonies(Written forthisKinks of Camelot prompt)





	bored

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the following Kinks of Camelot prompt:  
> " _King Uther is reprimanding a bunch of miscreant knights or delivering a boring speech for which Arthur has to stand beside him and look all haughty and commanding with his hands folded behind his back_  
>  _Merlin can't hold back his grins and laughter at Arthur's stuffy face as he stands with (a very disapproving but also amused) Gaius in the audience_  
>  _Arthur notices and pulls a face at him, for which Merlin beams and pouts and blows him a kiss_  
>  _Arthur purses his lips and raises a hand slightly, "catching" the "kiss" and pressing it to his heart_  
>  _They don't realise they're in public and everyone's watching them instead of the king XD_  
>  _Merthur only please, if I wanted this with another ship I'd have asked... for... another... ship..._ "

His left buttock itches. He can't very well stretch and relieve himself of the inconvenience, though, can he?

"Ranulph of Brechfa, come forward!" Uther says, the chatter dying down as his words echo in the throne room.

He's seen his fair share of knighting ceremonies, and he knows this Rolph of who-remembers - as every knight-to-be to follow - is going to launch into a passionate list of vows, enunciating how he would be loyal to his lord and would always defend a lady and would only speak the truth and _bla bla bla_. Not even the pure glee brought by imagining the sheer amount of initiation rites and pranks he's going to witness in the next days distracts him from how utterly boring the whole drag is.

He can't fathom why he's not allowed to rest his itching backside on a comfortable cushion, on a very much comfortable throne. As his father is currently doing beside him, the bugger.

_"You would only slouch!" parrots Arthur, once they cross the threshold to his chambers._  
_"More like fall asleep," Merlin mutters._  
_"I heard you!"_

__

__

In dire need of drastic measures, his eyes fall on the first row of the audience. Merlin and Gaius are tucked behind a pillar, and there's quite a sneaky reason why Merlin has chosen that spot. He's biting his lips to smother his laughter and not-so-subtly snorting; Gaius' intent stare while he's elbowing Merlin in the ribs is a dead giveaway, anyway.

Merlin scratches his eyebrow and lifts his gaze, meeting Arthur's. Without averting his eyes, Merlin joins his hands behind his back and straightens his spine sucking in his guts. He rolls his shoulders with theatrical flair, mocking – Arthur realises – his own stuffy posture. Arthur attempts a glare, but he suspects it comes across as barely concealed amusement – and no little amount of relief at having found a welcome distraction.

Merlin keeps the pose and lowers his eyelids as he wiggles his head raising his chin, at which Arthur blows him a raspberry while crossing his eyes, royal dignity be damned - he's been stuck suffering these soporific rituals for an amount of time that could be effectively described as _too much_.

The little shit has the audacity to _pout_ at him, of all things. Gaius' elbowing-in-the-ribs hasn't stopped yet. Arthur just narrows his eyes at Merlin, whose eyes twinkle and positively _beam_ at him, painting his features in the unmistakeable resemblance of a besotted maiden.

 _With Arthur._ Besotted, that is.

Merlin brushes his palm against his lips and then blows across it towards Arthur, who grabs the kiss from the air and lowers his hand against his chest, cupped right above where his heart is thudding contentedly.

He's broken out of his reverie by a cough at his left. For a moment, he doesn't understand why Merlin's eyes widen out of nowhere or why Gaius' elbows aren't aimed at Merlin's sides anymore – and his thin lips are suspiciously just shy of a grin – or why chirping crickets wouldn't feel out of place. Chirping crickets. _Oh._

That would explain the sea of mouths agape and cocked heads and rapt expressions and the whole lovely picture that could frankly –

"For heaven's sake, it's the worst kept secret in Camelot, no need to look so surprised! Shut your mouths before you catch flies," demands Uther, voice tinged with exasperation.

As soon as the shoal of goldfish obliges, Arthur's gaze turns to Ro- Ral- ( _he-couldn't-care-less_ is more likely). The bloke is sporting a glare so sour it would turn butter rancid and right after Uther's eyes land on him, the latter surprises Arthur with a potent eyeroll – the likes of which he's often been the recipient of, but has never seen directed to anyone else, let alone while disregarding the pomp of a knighting ceremony.

"Ugh, spare me the sight," says Uther. "Let us resume this travesty and get it over with, shall we?"

He-couldn't-care-less turns a ghastly shade of puce at the word 'travesty' but he has the dignity to avoid any spluttering. _Pillock_.

Arthur puckers his lips at Merlin followed by a proper smack and winks at the aforementioned pillock. He's not so sure he's going to leave their first sparring unscathed, but a little bruising is a small price to pay for the sadistic exhilaration the pranks he's already planning in his mind will bring.

**Author's Note:**

> If my brain conjured Sherlock's "[Bored](https://youtu.be/OVXt8jBAGkc?t=3)" or Villanelle's "[BORING!](https://youtu.be/vAk-N2rJkoQ?t=48)" while wondering about the title, I can't be held responsible.
> 
>  
> 
> Hope my attempt at humour is not that horrific


End file.
